What came up almost immediately in our walk was depression. I am very concerned that if I make the wrong move next I will plummet into depression. Here I am with no regular job, no permanent home, and lots of things up in the air and I feel better than when I have all those things in place. What a strange thing. I know I could look things like my parents probably are....what the hell are you doing?!?! get a job!?!? how can you think this is art?!?! how are you going to make money!?!? But there I was, on another walk, passively and actively looking for answers. Anywho, I wasn't going to say this to Nancy but I did. And she said well you can talk to me about it, I battle depression too. Well, there you go. This happily married woman, with adorable dogs, and a life very full with activity and substance has to make sure not to fell into the same traps I do. The same traps many folks have to deal with.
That was an amazing thing that came out almost immediately as we held hands. Wow, it just floored me how open we can be. So on we walked. Ironically, as we walked the streets we ran into a friend of Nancy's. Which I think made her really nervous. This project is pretty out there and there we were talking to her former dog walker as we held hands. The great thing is...she never flinched or took away her hand. She explained what we were doing and we chatted for awhile like nothing was weird and then away we went.
We then got into a popular artist conversation. how do we make money doing what we are doing....and I think I see a few things clearly now. how to make money being good at: marketing, making art you may not care much about spiritually but that you know will sell, busting your ass, and luck. And we both said we don't want to do is make work that we doesn't resonate with us soulfully, and that when you mix art with money it can feel wrong. It was a great conversation and I am so glad Nancy pushed herself into this project. She wrote she is going to discuss the benefits of hand holding with her husband and she if she can work this into their routine. :) Or at least try it out. Again each walk, has a new topic that emerges, a new angle. Maybe this is all just one big healing for me. Or maybe this is something I will do my whole life to inspire and create with others. Wow.