I may be slightly impeded in writing this blog post. As I have eaten so much pizza, this weekend I may explode. This is Pam and Alan's doing as they took me to Arturo's on Friday night. :)
Pam is a friend of mine from our travels to Ghana, Africa. we both were older than the young ones on the trip. In my case just by a year or two but at the time that felt like a big gap for some of the students on the trip. Pam and I bunked together in Cape Coast. She is a musician and studies bones, as in animal bones. You can ask her the techinical name. :) She can tell you all about Lucy and in general is super smart. ranging from music, theater, art, into science and politics. Pam was one of the first people to say, SURE Paige! come stay with me! I will house you for your project." Alan is her very kind and smart boyfriend, who I hung out with at Arturo's and then on this walk.
As you all may notice I don't have as many walks in NYC as other places. That is because I got out there and saw a few museums while I was in town. NYC is a mecca of art activity and I wasn't going to miss that. And I didn't force any walks. My cousin, Grace and I met up. But we never got to holding hands. We walked in central park. We had a very lovely dinner. But we never got to the hand holding. And this is probably just what I needed to do. As I get into this project farther, I have to rest more, as the road makes me tired. I want to have quality walks, not quantity. I am just trying to stay in the mindset that I take what comes and I am prepared.
With Pam and Alan, we had it scheduled for Sunday afternoon from the day I got in. We all sort of hung around the house and got ready slowly. Which I really needed to do after the speed of this trip. Then we got out and ran an errand at Duane Reed on Dyckman St. We started holding hands from there. It is strange to walk in between a couple. Especially a couple that usually holds hands with each other while they walk. Along with this, I worry about holding the hands of people's boyfriends and husbands because I don't want anyone to get angry at me or their partner. This was not an issue on this walk. They both mentioned how comfortable it was to hold my hand.
We walked on a bike path that is by the Hudson River. We did a great number of amazing hand holding moves as we let bikers pass. It was fun to navigate three of us through a busy path. At some point walking the three of us became natural. Pam pointed this out in her reading that it felt like we had always been walking together. Alan relates how I became a sort of channel for the love that Pam and he already share. Which, hell, if that isn't the sweetest thing to hear. It was really nice for me to be around two people who truly care about each other. As I go through this project, I realize more and more I am observing others people's lives just as much as I am trying to get to hold hands. I am learning a lot. Including, that I shouldn't touch pizza ever again. That love is something shown through small actions and open hearts. It is in the details of planning how things will work and showing up.
There were a few akward moments, navigating holding alan's hand as he was leading and had to change the position of his hands. One time, I thought he wanted to intertwine fingers. People like to do that on walks. I had read him wrong and it was a little uncomfortable to navigate that. But that lasted about 5 seconds of weirdness. also, towards the end, he held my hand in the air while he used both hands as he took a picture. which was brillant and will be in a dance I choreograph, most definitely. Pam and I started holding hands very tightly but half way through it became more like half of our hands. It was comfortable but it wasn't the palm to palm hand holding. No judgement on this, just observing the different ways you can hold someone's hand.
I had trouble paying attention to both Pam and Alan at the same time. Sometimes it felt like I was walking with Pam and then with Alan. I did wonder what people that of us. Three adults clinging to each other's hands as we navigated this bike path. I must admit, it made me smile. :) Fuck 'em. Fuck rules. Let's walk three astride. By the end of the walk, things had come together, and it felt like we were all
Our walk was long and very picturesque. The George Washington Bridge is a stunner. All these quirky post World War 1 spots along the river. That were not well marked but gave a great view to the river.
I have to admit. I am tired. Traveling is not easy and New York is not an easy city. I am feeling a bit lost. A bit lost while feeling the strongest I have ever felt. I am the thinnest I have been in years. I have made my art, my life. What great feelings! But I have a restless spirit and I force myself to keep going.
I keep thinking about something my friend, Tom, would tease me about..."Paige, Pages, come on. Loosen up. Go get laid." Now Tom, loves to give me a hard time. Like a good friend does. But he is partly speaking the truth. If I don't loosen up and stop taking this all so seriously. I will never let anyone in. And I will never get laid again. :)
WAITING for some awesome pics from Alan and for Blogger to upload my pics.